I don’t remember a lot about how we celebrated Father’s Day when I was younger. I feel kind of bad for my lack of memories regarding the specifics, but in my defense, I was (am?) self-absorbed. I hope we always made my dad feel special. In his line of work, he didn’t have to wear a suit to work, so he was spared years’ worth of hideous ties (though I do remember one year my brother and I picking out one for Christmas at a kids-only shop. It had gingerbread men and buttons sewn on. ‘Nuff said).
My dad doesn’t ask for a lot. He has always been someone who values memories and good times shared over a new barbecue cover (except maybe the Saskatchewan Roughriders one we got him last year. I suspect he sleeps with that curled under his head at night). Ultimately, as long as we were all together on Father’s Day, I have no doubt he was happy.
Now I have my own kids and another father in my life to celebrate. Personality-wise, my husband and my dad are as different as night and day, but they both enjoy similar things: beer (the good craft kind), barbecue, more beer and maybe a hockey or football game, even if it involves teams they have no real allegiance to.
When I asked my husband tonight what he wanted to do this Father’s Day, he said he wouldn’t mind some peace and quiet for awhile, but mostly, he just wanted to hang out with us and have a nice day. He wasn’t averting his eyes, so I think he was being truthful and hopefully this wasn’t one of those occasions of I’m-just-saying-I-want-something-simple-but-actually-I-expect-a-roomful-of-cheerleaders-to-spell-out-my-name. You-can-choose-the-cheerleaders-but-I-hear-the-ones-for-the-Cowboys-are-hot. I hate those awkward moments that stem from simple miscommunication.
So let’s do a recap: alcohol, good food and time with family. That sounds awfully familiar. With the exception of numbered uniforms and men chasing each other with balls or sticks (that came out wrong), is it possible dads and moms both want primarily the same things for their respective days, with a bit of recognition for the role they play in the family, added for good measure?
In that case, thank you, dad and Husband for all that you’ve done and all that you’ll continue to do for your kids and your partners. Thanks for adding your own unique brand of crazy to your children so mom and I don’t have to bear that full responsibility on our own. Thanks for still showing up even though we admittedly often get more of the parenting credit than you do.
And thank you for being easy to please and making it so easy to make this day special for you. I am grateful that making memories is the most important thing to you, mostly because I don’t actually know any cheerleaders.